Election Apocalypse?

Nah.

Sadly, again with the Jakob Dylan...I can't find a downloadable electoral map anywhere online that I can rip off and glue here.

I was sharing with my students today how I remember the election of 2000 and staying up until 2 a.m. in a hotel room in the rural underbelly of one of the Midwestern states. My coworker and I, being wherever we were for a regional conference, finally fell asleep and waited until the next day to find out that Al Gore had conceded the election to GWB. I was shocked at how quickly it was over last night. I mostly avoided the hype out of a desire to soak up the apocalypse as completely as possible, but I did watch various coverages of the election returns on the youtube election hub. And yes. I, too, enjoyed Diane Sawyer's display.

Many thanks to a faraway cousin of mine for posting the following as his facebook status:
"All of this political griping is ridiculous! Did you all forget the world is ending next month!"
And that's how I've been feeling about the whole election. Of course, I'm an issue voter and I have issues, so my decision was made a long time ago.

Too bad about the map. I did find something else to rip off and glue:

During Halloween staycation in North Las Vegas (during which, I must say, there were a gaggle of ghouls of the "terminally cute" variety!), I caught just a glimpse of Doomsday Preppers on the National Geographic channel. Although I have mentioned it in this blog before, lamenting that I cannot watch it, but following the Doomsday Dashboard with wild abandon...the best part was making fun of the preppers with Miss Gokey.

Interesting that mega-earthquakes are only trending at 15% on the Dashboard tonight, given that the Guatemalan president has announced 48 deaths resulting from the 7-and-a-half quake that hit San Marcos today.

Speaking of Halloween, Jodi sent me an interesting article about a real-life military training exercise which was of course in the beautiful locale of San Diego. Apparently, the soldiers and sailors took part in a zombie apocalypse exercise. The president of the Halo, Corp. security company that was running the exercise (sounds a little bit Resident Evil, no? Umbrella Corporation, anyone?) said that news of the simulated zombie invasion, useful because in many ways zombie actions replicate terrorist actions (zombies are terrorists!), invited calls from "whackjobs." Haha. You can read about it here.

That's about all I can say about the end of the world tonight. I have a lot of work to do that has nothing to do with apocalypse skills and everything to do with teaching strategies and the manipulation of the minds of little ones. By little, of course, I mean 14 years old.

I *do* have this, courtesy of the Northwest Indiana Times via my dad:

Creepy, huh? Don't worry, there's more where this one comes from.

Keep me apprised of any new developments in your own preparations, and I'll do the same.

Out With A Bang!

Friday will begin my summer travel season with my annual trip to my hometown of Hammond, IN.
With the trip approaching, I thought to myself that I had to do one last CRAZYVEGAS thing before getting out of town. I decided to go ahead and take a trip to The Gun Store.

It has probably been 15 years since I last handled a firearm. I aimed that one at a rice cake in a river and nearly wet myself after taking one shot and handing whatever the gun was right back to its owner. I resolved that since I've spent plenty of time shooting Nerf Darts and cartoon chickens and cartoon zombies...it was time to go and see if I could actually defend myself against an attacker using a firearm in real life.

I could not myself believe what I was about to do. It's very anti-me in many ways. I was so nervous during the drive, thinking, "Why do I feel the need to do this? I should just turn around now and go home..." that I was unaffected by the awful pop music on the radio. Finally, I reminded myself that it's better to have a skill and never use or need it, then to never have it.

It was 105 degrees. The Gun Store is under construction as they expand and add a new range, but they are open. I stood outside with the tourists and waited for my turn to get my name added to the shooter list. It is worth noting that the Gun Store does in fact have a "zombie" package, because like I said on Tuesday, there are many schemes to separate you from your money. Lucky for me, there was a female zombie target for a SIGNIFICANTLY lower price, so I chose that one. After you choose your package and they try to upsell you, you then have to sign a release attesting, "that you're not pregnant or crazy," then you proceed inside, where you hand your ticket to a guy who gives you your target, you pay your fee and then are ushered into a line to wait your turn to shoot.

Incidentally, there is a $50 option for shooting, where you can get a more in-depth tutorial and a semi-private shooting room. Despite my crippling anxiety at the thought of holding a device in my hand that could very really and seriously kill another human, I chose the public range because...it comes with the package I paid for. After you pay and get into the line, you wait...and wait...and wait...and if you're me, you nearly chicken out.

But then a lil blonde lady in a bright pink dress comes out, composes herself and says, "Thanks!" Mackenzie Warren from News 3 was in the store getting footage for her story about how the Palazzo wants to install a gun range in their property on the Strip. This was enough of a distraction that when my instructor J.R., a nice young man who was very patient, ushered me through the door, I hurried in order to not be caught on video.

Going to the Gun Store is completely different from aiming at a rice cake in a river. There are ear protectors, safety glasses, and...well...J.R.s.

Today (Wednesday), as my Summer 2012 TTFN to Las Vegas, I put 19 holes in a paper zombie with a Glock 19. Granted, most of the 19 holes are in her hair.

J.R. offered to take a photo of me AT the range. WITH the gun. I declined. I'm still not exactly comfortable with the whole idea, and wasn't ready to have it immortalized on my SD card (or here). If I ever decide to go back there again, and somehow miraculously get a shot right through the middle of the zombie invader's forehead...then maybe. But that day was not today.